Lauren. 23. On the fence about just about everything.
do you ever get that feeling when you remember really bad memories and you just
I have at least one horrible memory associated with every person that I care about.
Whenever I get sentimental I squash the feeling with the bad memory.
It’s something I started doing when I became a teenager, and feeling really fond of my parents/family and still attached to them made me really uncomfortable (like physically uncomfortable; I stopped letting any of them touch me, and I started noticing and becoming really conscious of the bodily reactions that come with all sorts of emotions).
But then I tried to form meaningful relationships with my peers and found that I’d gotten very good at shutting down that “warm/safe” feeling and couldn’t stop.